prologue to Morning Bliss' Longing or Acceptance
by Me-rite-much
Summary: Since lots of people asked to know the story about what took place before morning bliss, so here you go. Tai is going through tough times dealing with his feelings for Matt. Taito/yamachi


Longing For Acceptance  
  
By: me-rite-much  
  
Disclaimer: digimon don't belong to me and all that blah blah belongs to fox. Toei animation. Actually, if I buy some shares of toei animation or fox broadcasting. digimon would technically be 15.000000 % mine. Hmmmmm, next time I write a fic, there will be no disclaimer BECAUSE DIGIMON WOULD BE 15.0000000 PERCENT MINE AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!....sry, had a crazy moment back there  
  
A/n: ok, now everyone should thank kara t for this fic because he was the one who suggested I write what happened before Morning Bliss took place, i.e. what made tai wunna kill himself, how matt helped him and all that other stuff. SO THANK KARA T B4 I KICK U SQUA IN DA NUTZ!!!!! Sry, had a crazy moment back there.. So anyway, you can read Morning Bliss first if you want, or this one first, doesn't matter really, this is just to show everyone what happened before. Morning Bliss was really meant to be a one shot, but what the hey, I need to write more yamachi fics anyway so I might as well write this =) O and one more thing, I am improvising this fic, meaning I am just coming up with it right now with no real idea what to do, so please review and tell me if I did ok with the plot and stuff.  
  
WARNING: THIS FIC CONTAINS YAOI (boyxboy) STUPH, SO IF U NOT INTO THAT LEAVE RIGHT NOW AND READ MY OTHER STORY, Nights into dreams: New Ascension of Evil BECAUSE THAT FIC ROXORS!!!!!!!!!! THIS FIC ALSO CONTAINS ATTEMPTED SUICIDE, AND ANGST SO IF U DON'T LIKE THAT EITHER BACK OFF!!!!!  
  
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Tai winced as he felt the rough metal cut through his wrists and give him the release he so desperately needed. He felt the warm blood trickle down his wrist and saw it fall on the ground. It was the only thing that would help him escape the misery he was going through. The same misery that had been plaguing him for a while now. It wasn't abuse from his family, or at school. But it would happen if Tai told everyone his deepest secret. . .  
  
Tai Kamiya was a homosexual, and in love with his best friend, Matt Ishida.  
  
Tai quickly wiped off the blood from his wrist and stayed sitting in the corner of the parking garage he was hiding at. Lately he had been hating every waking moment of his life, every moment awake just meant he had to deal with being around him. . . It hurt the brunette deeply inside to know he could never have Matt, but he could at least be friends with the blonde, and for that reason only Tai did not take that razor blade and end it all that very moment. "At least I can still be near him" Tai quietly whispered to himself as he cried softly, letting the tears fall and not caring if anyone saw him. He needed this time alone to be with no one so he could build up the strength he needed to keep up that barrier of happiness he hid himself behind. 'Matt isn't the only one who suffers with his emotions' Tai thought to himself as he started to wipe off his tears.  
  
It was nearing 6:00 p.m. now, and Tai silently watched the ending of the sunset as the new night was appearing. All the beautiful colors of the sunset were now being replaced by the dark navy blue which signaled the beginning of another crisp, cold night. He hugged himself a bit to help fend off the cold that was starting. Not many cars were in the parking lot in which he was hiding at. He sat on the curb in front of a huge garage door inside the lot that was meant to store important deliveries that needed to be made to the restaurant across the street. There was a small roof above the door that stretched a bit over the door and over Tai. He silently leaned against the cold hard cement and let a few more tears come out as he watched the beautiful sky above him. He longed to be held by his love at the park, where they would both silently watch the sunset together. 'Together' Tai thought to himself sadly, 'if only. . .'. Tai knew that wouldn't happen however, for him, Matt was just one of those things that was always so close, yet too far to get.  
  
"I would do anything to have you . . ." Tai whispered to himself as he wiped off his last tear and stood up. 'I better go home before everyone starts worrying about me.' He walked quietly back to his home, which was only about a mile and a half away, it was good because it did give him some time to think a bit more before he got home. While he was walking he reminisced about him and the other digidestineds adventures in the digiworld. The battles with myotismon, the Dark Masters, and the first time he saw, him.  
  
It was only about a year and a half ago when he first saw Matt. Tai remembered walking around the summer camp, meeting all the new kids, checking out the place to see everything there was to see. Then he remembered meeting Matt's brother T.K. The little tyke was very playful, and then T.K. told him about Matt. The first time Tai saw Matt was the first time Tai really knew what it meant about being in love. Seeing the blondes slender form leaning against the tree, playing the harmonica that gave off such a beautiful sound whenever he used it made Tai feel so good inside. Then they all went to the digiworld. . .  
  
Tai and Matt fought so much there even though they were friends. He spent a while thinking Matt really did hate him and wanted nothing more then to leave digiworld and never see him again, but when Matt told him how much their friendship meant Tai knew at least Matt didn't truly hate him. He remembered the fighting, believe or not, Tai did greatly enjoy when they would both wrestle on the ground during their fights. That was the only time Tai could feel his love hold him, even though it was an act of violence.  
  
Then there was the time Matt held Tai's hand when the arrows plunged through them. Tai savored the feeling of his love holding on to his hand. All of those moments meant something special to Tai, but now that those times were over, he would never be able to experience those feelings again. Tai quietly sighed as he realized he was nearing his families apartment building. "Oh well," Tai said to himself as he got in the elevator. "At least its summer time and I don't have to worry about school for the next few months."  
  
He took out the key and opened the door. Apparently no one was there. Tai saw a small note on the kitchen counter and read it to himself. "hmmm, sorry we couldn't be there, but we needed to pick up some things at the store and Kari really wanted the drive so she could listen to her music in the car, you know how much she likes that. We'll be back in a few hours, dinners in the microwave, love, Mom, Dad and Kari." Tai shrugged and put the letter away. "Well, at least now I can clean up what I did to my wrists in peace."  
  
Tai went to the bathroom and wiped up what was left of the abuse he had given himself less than an hour ago. He knew it wasn't healthy to do that to himself, but slitting his wrists was the only thing that could distract him from the constant torture of knowing Matt could never be his. He hated knowing that. Tai wished deeply that he could spill his heart out to Matt and tell the whole world about himself, but he knew what would happen if anyone found out about his sexual orientation. He would obviously be kicked of his middle school soccer team, he would also be picked on, beat up, threatened and other terrible things. He knew that would happen because there was one boy who came out recently. Tai was there, it was during a class he had and the boy was just sitting in his desk somewhere by the back. The teacher was gone because there was a phone call he needed to get. There were some kids talking in the corner around that boy and the kids were making tons of jokes about gays and some other garbage no one outside that group paid attention to. All of a sudden, the boy just couldn't take it anymore and simply started screaming at the other kids.  
  
Tai remembered every word of it. "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE!?" the boy yelled at the top of lungs. "WHY DO YOU HATE GAYS SO MUCH, DON'T YOU KNOW YOUR IGNORANCE IS WHY MANY OF US STILL SUFFER WITH YOUR BULLSHIT?!" then Tai remembered the expression on the boys face as he realized what he just told the whole classroom. "Oh my god" the boy said to himself as he simply got up and ran out of the classroom. Everyone could see he was desperately trying to hold back tears as he ran away from there. That boy didn't come back for the next few days, and when he did, he was met by a lot of hatred. Many kids started picking on him, and others calling him vulgar names when he walked by. The boy moved away a few weeks later.  
  
Sometimes Tai could almost feel the other boys pain as he was being mistreated by the other kids. He wanted to tell him that he wasn't alone. But, there was too much risk in that. He simply stood by and witnessed the pain the kid went through.  
  
Tai quickly finished cleaning out the wounds on his wrists, then moved the end of his white hand gloves to cover any signs of his cutting. Tai then heated his dinner and went to the couch to watch some t.v.  
  
Tai woke up the next morning at about 7:30 a.m. groaning sleepily, he punched the snooze button of his clock. 'Another day of misery' he thought to himself as he sat up in the bunkbed. Kari was already awake and watching t.v. with their cat Miko. "Good morning Kari" Tai yawned sleepily as he was walking to the fridge to get some milk for breakfast.  
  
"Morning bro" she said as she was watching her Saturday morning cartoons. "what are you gonna do today Tai?" she asked as her brother was pouring the milk into the bowl to eat some cereal.  
  
"I dunno, I guess I'll go outside and walk for a while, maybe kick the soccer ball around in the park for a bit."  
  
"Well then," Kari replied as she turned from the couch to face her brother. "Matt called a while ago and wanted to know If you would wanna go to his house and play video games if you had nothing else to do today." Upon hearing those words Tai spilled the milk on the counter, with his mouth wide open. Not realizing what a scene he just made. 'I can't stand being near him all day, I wouldn't be able to spend even an hour without losing myself in his beauty' Tai thought to himself as Kari was trying to snap him out of his trance. Kari finally achieved getting his attention. "Um," Tai started to reply, "I guess since I have nothing else to do." 'Why did you have to tell me that Kari, now I have to go.' Tai mentally scolded.  
  
"So Kari, you got anything you wunna do today?" Tai asked, desperately trying to change the subject.  
  
"I have a song that I want to find online, so I'm gonna stay in today." Kari replied while petting their cat. "Izzy is gonna help me find the song through that instant massaging thing." She added.  
  
"Don't you mean instant messenger?" Tai corrected with a chuckle.  
  
"Don't laugh at me when I make mistakes you meanie!" Kari playfully said while throwing a mean look Tai's way. Tai finished cleaning the kitchen counter and also finished eating.  
After taking a shower and getting dressed in his favorite blue shirt, the same one he went to the digiworld with, then getting his goggles, Tai waved goodbye to his sister and also told her to say "good morning" to his parents for her when they woke up. After leaving the apartment complex, Tai started the dreaded walk to Matt's place. 'God I really don't want to do this' Tai thought to himself as he was taking the long way to Matt's. 'But I guess I have no other choice since I told Kari I would go.' Tai still didn't know how he was going to make it through that day at Matt's house without losing control and jumping on him like a love crazed lunatic.  
  
"*sigh* Here goes something" Tai told himself as he rang the doorbell in front of the apartment. Matt opened the door a few seconds later, he was wearing his green no sleeve shirt, the same one he always wears. Tai remembered the first time he saw Matt at the day camp, he was wearing that shirt, or it might be a copy, because Tai remembered Matt had about 3 or 4 pairs of that same exact shirt in his closet.  
  
"Hey Tai, what's up?" Matt asked as he answered the door. Tai couldn't help but be lost in those luscious, azure eyes that belonged to Matt. "Um, Tai, you okay?" Matt asked after Tai simply stood there for a few seconds. Tai quickly snapped out of it and walked inside.  
  
"Sorry about spacing out back there Matt" Tai apologized as he made his way to Matt's Xbox.  
  
"No problem, besides, my dads off doing some report in America and he won't be back for a while, so it gets kind of boring here." Matt went to get something from the fridge. "Hey Tai" Matt said as he was checking the fridge. "You want any soda? I got some cans of pepsi and some other stuff."  
  
"I'll take a pepsi" Tai responded as he was staring at the pause screen of the single player mode of Halo Matt was at. It seems he only had a bit of health left, and he was taking his chances with the only weapon he had left, a pistol, and Tai didn't think 20 hp and 6 pistol ammo would do Matt any good against 35 grunts.  
  
"Hey Matt," Tai said as he was still staring at the game screen. "You DO know that those grunts are gonna whoop your ass right?" Matt went to the xbox, reset the game, shrugged, handed Tai his can of pepsi, then responded.  
  
"You don't think I know that? That's part of the reason I need you to come here today, I'm always getting killed at this part and I need some freaking help. Damn covenant keep pouring out and I have to waste valuable ammo killing them so I can get to the dropship survivors." Matt handed Tai a controller and chose the two-player campaign mode.  
  
"Ok," Tai said as he was being handed his controller. "I guess since you can never be a super-pro like me at this game, I can help you out." Tai laughed as Matt got mad and threw a pillow that was nearby at Tai.  
  
"Whatever Tai," Matt said laughing as the pillow hit his goggle- headed friend. "If you were so good at this game Tai," Matt said as he was playing the game "You wouldn't have died so many times on the first level."  
  
Tai and Matt played the game for a while, for Matt, it was a great time just hanging with a friend, but for Tai, it was pure suffering. Tai couldn't handle it anymore and got up. "Everything ok Tai?" Matt asked as his friend got up.  
  
"Yeah Matt, I just need to use the bathroom for a sec, ok?" Tai started the walk to the bathroom and Matt simply shrugged and unpaused the game to play a bit more. Tai quickly locked the door behind him and turned on the water fountain. 'I need the release, badly' Tai thought as he took out the razor blade and started pushing it against the already wounded flesh of his wrist.  
  
He felt the familiar cold, hard sting of the metal once again cutting his skin. Tai winced and grunted a bit as he kept pushing the blade deeper into his flesh. Being so close to Matt made Tai crazy inside. He needed something to hold him off until he could finish this day. Tai checked his wristwatch. It was only 1:30 p.m. "Oh my god," Tai looked at the watch in astonishment. "I am not gonna make it, I really need to get away from Matt before I go nuts." Tai stopped slashing his wrists, then wiped the blade clean with some toilet paper, flushed it, and started to clean up. Tai didn't notice however, that a few drops of blood had hit the bathroom floor. Tai had tried to hold a napkin on his lap while he slit his wrists, but a few drops made their way to the floor.  
  
Matt looked at the living room clock, 'hmmm, he's been in there for quite a while, I guess I should check up on him.' Matt thought to himself as he paused the game and went to knock on the bathroom door. "Tai!" Matt yelled while knocking. "Everything ok in there Tai?" Tai heard Matt and panicked.  
  
"Uh, yeah Matt, I'm ok, just dropped my watch into the toilet by accident, heh, stupid of me. I'm washing it right now, don't worry, its waterproof so I can clean it."  
  
'He dropped his watch into the toilet?' Matt thought to himself as he stood by the bathroom door. 'Oh well, I'm not even gonna try to find out how the hell that happened.' Matt walked back to the game and started playing again.  
  
Tai got out of the bathroom and walked over to Matt then sat down. "ok Matt," Tai said as he grabbed his controller. "Time to kill some more covenant." Matt looked over at Tai and noticed something strange.  
  
Looking closer, something was wrong with Tai's hands. "Tai, what happened to your wrist?" Matt said, grabbing a hold of Tai's arm. The brunette quickly shook his arm away and yelled out "Nothing!" Matt began to get suspicious. "Tai, what's going on?" Matt started to get worried.  
  
Tai quickly responded "Nothings wrong Matt" Tai tried to reassure him, "I just fell before I got to your house, that's all" Tai said as he moved his glove over the wound.  
  
"Tai," Matt said with a very serious tone, "If anything is happening to you, you know you can tell me."  
  
"Nothing is happening Matt!" Tai replied angrily. "I just fell on the way here and I got a bit scratched up by a rock, that's it! God, can't I trip anymore?!" Matt looked Tai in the eyes for a second, as if searching for something, meanwhile, Tai's mind was filled a thousand thoughts a second. 'Damnit Tai!' the brunette mentally scolded himself, 'why the hell didn't I cover the wound! Damn, now he is gonna do everything he can to find out, good job you dumbass, real good.' Tai then felt a bit of relief once Matt stopped trying to stare him down, and returned to his game.  
  
"I'm getting bored of this game, we've been playing for like four hours already" Tai admitted as he got up. "I'm gonna go watch some t.v. in your room, ok Matt?"  
  
"Ok Tai, just as long as you don't go through all my stuff. . ." Tai then walked over to Matt's room. He opened the door and examined the room to see how much it has changed since the last time he was there. It was all pretty much the same mess it had been the last time Tai checked. Some of Matt's clothing was on the floor, and one article of clothing made Tai blush such a dark shade of red that he was glad no one else saw it. A pair of Matt's boxers where on the floor. Tai stood there for a while looking at the source of his loves' boxers. Thinking about Matt wearing those boxers was turning Tai on so much, and torturing him even deeper then he would like.  
  
'I know I can never have him' Tai thought to himself sorrowfully, 'but at least I can still fantasize' Tai then walked past a few shirts and other junk on the floor of Matt's room and turned on the T.V. There was nothing much on. He flipped through the channels for a while until one channel caught his eye. It was a news report about bi/homosexual children in middle through high school and how they cope with the problems they went through when they come out.  
  
Tai was shocked about how badly some of these kids were treated. Something more shocking was the story about one boy who was beaten to death in 8th grade a few days after coming out. It seemed he was walking alone when another kid and some friends ganged up on him and went too far. They were all found, yet because they were juveniles, would have to be tried again once they reached 18, or else they would be let out once they were 18. Tai couldn't take anymore of the news report and turned off the t.v. quickly. He started weeping quietly to himself and laid down on Matt's bed.  
  
'My god' Tai thought as he was weeping. 'All the suffering those kids went through just because of their orientation, now I know I am in for a lot of messed up stuff if I even let Kari know anything about what I feel for Matt.' Tai quickly wiped off his tears and dug his head into Matt's pillow. The aroma of Matt's hair on the pillow made Tai feel so safe and happy. He started spacing out into his little fantasy world. In Tai's fantasy, he and Matt were laying down in Matt's bed, simply staring at the ceiling and enjoying eachothers love. "I love you so much Matt" Tai whispered into the pillow. Almost immediately after Tai was snapped out of his fantasy as he heard Matt say "You ok Tai?"  
  
Tai quickly sat up, shocked. 'Oh no, did he hear what I said?!? God, what will I do if he heard me!?!?' "Tai," Matt said as he started to walk over to Tai and put a hand on his friends shoulder. "I think you need to chill out, you have been acting so tense today, after that brag you made about being so good at halo, you have been doing nothing but act so jumpy and depressed."  
  
"It's nothing" Tai said quietly while looking down at the floor.  
  
"NO" Matt started to sound angry as he tightened his grip on Tai's shoulder. "I know somethings wrong! You never act like this! Listen Tai" Matt said as he kneeled down and raised Tai's chin with his hand. "Why have you been crying?" Matt said as he saw how red Tai's eyes now were. "If anyone is hurting you Tai, at school or home, you know you can tell me. I'm your friend, you can trust me Tai. I hate seeing you hurt like this, please tell me what's wrong, please."  
  
"I just can't tell you, ok Matt?!" Tai swung off Matt's hand and stood up.  
  
"Tai," Matt said as he stood up. "What could be so damaging that you wouldn't be able to tell me? Tai, just tell me what is wrong, I can help you through whatever you are going through, you know that . . ." But before Matt could finish the sentence, Tai just lashed out at him.  
  
"WHY CAN'T YOU JUST LEAVE ME ALONE?! I JUST CAN'T TELL YOU OK!" and with that, Tai quickly started running for the door. He didn't even try to stop the buildup of he tears he had tried so desperately to suppress when he was talking with Matt.  
  
"Tai, wait!" Matt yelled out as Tai ran out of the apartment. Matt knew he had to catch up with Tai, to find out what was wrong. He ran out of the apartment as well, Tai had run towards the emergency stairwell, so Matt chased him. It was actually only about noon when Tai had stormed out, Matt was amazed at how quickly everything had gone by.  
  
Tai's breathing got heavier and heavier as he fled the apartment complex where Matt lived and Tai started dashing to the only place he knew he could be in peace. The small garage door in the parking lot was a nice place because Tai could always see the beautiful sunset clearly, and no one else but him ever went there, so he could be alone and just gather his thoughts, which were mostly troubles. 'Damn' Tai thought to himself as he looked behind him and could see Matt was still chasing him. 'I can't believe he is still following me'.  
  
Tai finally made it to the garage and tried to run behind some parked cars in order to distract Matt so he could lose sight of him. "Tai!" Matt still yelled out as he was starting to near the spot Tai would often hide. He kept calling out his friends name until they finally reached the garage door that Tai was at. Tai finally reached the door. Breathing heavily, he looked around desperately to see if Matt had been able to keep track of him. Much to Tai's dismay, Matt had found him.  
  
"Damnit Tai!" Matt screamed as he neared the brunette. "This is enough! We need to get you some help for whatever the fuck is scaring you like this!" Then Matt looked on in utter shock as he saw Tai pull out the razor blade.  
  
Tai was getting desperate, he couldn't take Matt's interference anymore."No! Matt, I don't think I will ever be able to tell you, I just can't stand the pain it would bring. I'm sorry but since you cant stop hassling me about it, I have to find a way so that I will never be able to tell you. . ." and with a very desperate look on his face, Tai started to bring down the rusty, blood stained razor blade on his wrists.  
  
"Tai! No!" Matt screamed as he tackled Tai to the floor and struggled to remove the blade from Tai's hand.  
  
"Why can't you leave me alone. . ." Tai said weakly as he gave up his struggle and let Matt forcibly remove the blade. Tai simply curled up on the floor and started weeping uncontrollably. Now Matt saw past everything he thought was Tai. The carefree happiness it seems, was just a barrier of his true emotions, almost the same way Matt had been able to hide his true feelings for the brunette. All the times Tai would fool around others, but it was obvious he suffered heavily when he was alone. 'He must have gone through a lot in the digiworld, and all I did was make things worse for him, I fought with him so much then. I must have driven him to all this. . .' Matt thought to himself.  
  
Matt then kneeled down by Tai's weeping form, putting a hand on Tai's shoulder once more, he tried to ask him what was wrong. "Tai," Matt started as he too, began to weep a bit. "I care about what's wrong, you need to tell me! Look at what it's done to you. You're slitting your wrists, don't you know all you are doing is killing yourself slowly by doing all this?!?!" Matt started to get angrier. Tai just kept weeping for a while, then finally, tired of all that had happened, Tai started to speak in a very weak, and tired tone as he turned around to face the sky. There was a blank look in his eyes as he spoke. "Matt," Tai sighed as he started to wipe the tears from his eyes. "Ever since I first saw you at the summer camp, well, I've just felt. . . strange towards you, Matt."  
  
'What is Tai talking about?' Matt questioned himself mentally as Tai continued to speak. Matt, I don't really know how else to say this, but ever since the first time we've met, I have been in love with you. . ." Tai started to break down again and bawl. Matt was totally shocked at what he had just heard.  
  
'Oh my god!' Matt's thoughts raced, 'He loves me! I don't believe it! He loves me! I thought he would never feel the same way about me!' a big smile started to come over Matt's face as he realized that the boy he had feelings for loved him back!  
  
Tai was still on the floor bawling like mad, thinking the reason Matt was in complete shock was that he was disgusted by what he had said. Tai was too busy weeping to see the smile on Matt's face, and so out of one final, desperate move, Tai jumped to reach the razor. "No!" Matt said as he once again struggled with Tai to get a hold of the blade. Matt was yelling at the top of his lungs to tell Tai that he felt the same way, but Tai was too distracted by his sorrow that he couldn't hear anything Matt was telling him. So, to get Tai's attention, Matt closed his eyes and planted a soft kiss on Tai's lips.  
  
The moment Tai felt Matt's lips on his, he went wide-eyed and simply stopped everything he was thinking and doing. Thoughts of surprise and love flooded Tai's head as he felt Matt's lips on his. 'I can't believe it!' Tai thought to himself as he enjoyed that moment of happiness with his love. 'It's way better than I could ever imagine!' Tai simply surrendered himself and sunk deep into Matt's hold as he let himself be carried away by his love.  
  
They held that kiss for a while until they both could no longer hold their breath and broke it off. "Wow" was all Tai could breathe out as he was still dumbfounded by the fact that Matt had kissed him.  
  
"Tai," Matt said as he held Tai in his arms. "I've had feelings for you ever since the digiworld as well. That was the only reason I fought with you so much. . ." Matt was now wiping a few of the tears off of Tai's face as he held him in his arms. Matt felt something pelt his arm. He looked up, and he saw it was raining. In fact, it had been raining for quite a while already by the way the ground of the parking lot looked. Matt chuckled a little as he faced Tai again and put a hand through his loves thick, wonderful brunette hair. "I guess we've been so caught up in this that we didn't realize its pouring like crazy out here." Tai simply nodded in agreement and stood up as Matt helped him. Tai simply hugged Matt hard as he still couldn't believe that all this was true.  
  
Once Tai released Matt from the hug, Mat went over to where the razor blade was, picked it up, and walked over to Tai. He held up the blade and started speaking.  
  
"Tai," He began with a serious tone. "You have to promise me you won't harm yourself like this anymore; look at all it's done. I don't want to lose you Tai. . ." Matt whispered softly as he held one hand to Tai's face. Tai still had a sort of hurt look on his face as he saw the razor blade again.  
  
"Matt, I never wanted to make anyone mad, I just wanted to make the pain go away. . ." Tai hugged Matt again and Matt held him and whispered softly to Tai's ear  
  
"Now I am here to stop your pain, my Tai." The rain had gotten both of them very wet, Tai's hair was now very soggy as Matt stared into the eyes of his love and lost himself in Tai's dark eyes.  
  
"We should get out of here" Tai said as Matt snapped out of the trance he was in. "Yeah," Matt agreed as he saw how much it was starting to rain now. They both held each other as they walked back to Matt's apartment. The streets were surprisingly empty, Tai checked his watch and gasped in amazement as he saw what time it was.  
  
"I can't believe it's 4:30 p.m. already." Tai said as he looked away from his watch.  
  
"Wow, really?" Matt asked as he held Tai while they were walking. They both finally reached the apartment complex. They gratefully stepped in the elevator.  
  
"Tai," Matt realized as he examined Tai. "Your soaking wet, and so am I, so I guess we both gotta go warm up once we get to my place." Matt finally opened the door as he and Tai walked in. Matt went to get some towels for him and Tai.  
  
"I guess you have nothing to change into Tai." Matt noticed as Tai was drying up.  
  
"Your right" Tai said as he realized how soaked his clothes were. "Can I borrow some of yours?" Tai asked as a smile crept across his face.  
  
Matt chuckled a bit as he planted another soft kiss on Tai's lips. "No problem." He said as he pulled away.  
  
The cloudy sky had forced Matt to turn on the lights in the apartment. He then led Tai to his bedroom where he and Tai changed. Matt got another shirt for himself and Tai. Tai started to blush rapidly as he changed his pants in the same room with Matt. Matt noticed the blush, and offered to leave until Tai was done changing, but Tai simply told him  
  
"I really don't mind Matt, its just that I'm so happy being here with you." Tai decided to wear one of Matt's shirts and just stay in his boxers. Matt went to the kitchen to get some soda, and realized that he hadn't eaten anything since 8:00 a.m. He took out some Monterey Jack cheese and four loaves of bread and decided to just melt the cheese on the bread and enjoy. It was a good snack and would keep him full for a while. Matt asked Tai if he wanted anything to eat, he refused, so Matt went on to eating his snack. Once Matt was done, he went to his room to see how Tai was doing. Tai was in Matt's bed, apparently sleeping. "It looks we've both been through a lot for one day." Matt said as he saw Tai's sleeping form on his bed.  
  
Matt quietly got in and snuggled next to Tai. He planted a soft kiss on Tai's forehead and whispered "I love you". Tai's eyes opened slowly, kind of surprising Matt. Then Tai kissed Matt's lips and said "I love you too. . ." then he and Matt started to make out.  
  
They both kept at it for a few minutes, until Matt started to lower his hands into Tai's boxers. Matt quickly what he was doing and quickly pulled away, "wait Tai," he said as he pulled away from the great kiss he was sharing with Tai. Tai started to get a worried look on his face since he thought he did something wrong. Matt saw the look on Tai's face and quickly reassured him  
  
"No, Tai, it's nothing you did, I just want to make sure you are ready to go this far. . . I don't want to hurt you in any way."  
  
A smile appeared on Tai's face as he planted a soft kiss on Matt's lips and whispered "I am ready for this, I need you badly, Yamato." 'He called me by my real name. . .' Matt thought to himself. "Ok then Tai, if you are ready, so am I." and with that, he went back to kissing Tai.  
  
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A/N: Well there you go, I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed making it. I really just made up the fic as I went along, so please r&r cause I really wanna know how good I did for just an improv. Now I know some people might be wondering why did I just end it there, and not continue with what happened. That is simply because all that would be written would be a very vague lime. Ff.net don't allow lemons and I really don't feel like making a lime out of this. Its already pretty limey though so don't worry. I am thinking about writing another part to this whole thing, that will take place after Morning Bliss and would deal with Matt and Tai finally coming out. If you all really want me to write about them coming out in what might possibly be another angsty fic, then e-mail me.  
  
Questions, comments, and any other stuff can be sent to quake3rox@aol.com and like I said before, quake 3 sux, but I had the screen name before I had the game so there u go. And one more thing I am gonna tell you, if you are really a big fan of yamachi/taito, or pretty much any kind of pairing or fic or whatever, and you have some good ideas for a story, WRITE IT! Don't simply cruise websites time after time looking for that perfect fic and never finding it because everyone who writes, writes stuff u don't wunna read. If you are really a big fan and have ideas for stories, I encourage you to write them and post them. If anyone who reads this is finally inspired to write something, and you do, then e-mail me because I want to know that people are finally quitting being lazy like I was for a while, and writing your great ideas for the whole world to enjoy. 


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